It does not make sense to order gaming when I'm obsessed with working and achieving financial security. But after meeting my friends and catching up on old times, I realize how hollow and empty I feel not being able to game and play.
How do I fit in Gaming when I study about 30 hours a week, and Work 35 hours a week? The logical solution is to make the Gaming serve two purposes - Time with my Son and family and time for me. I'm sure you'll realize the amount of lost control that happens when you play with someone who may not be interested in gaming.
Time with family is something I've neglected because of how hard work is. Juggling HSK and PMBOK, and laying the groundwork for RHEL Sys Admin, as well as the bringing the family business to more modern management Practices (reminds me of benefits of Quality Management - Leadership, Evidence-Based Decision Making, Process, Improvement, Relationship Management, Engagement of People, and Customer Focus).
I miss hanging out with Friends and Gamers, but at the same time committing to having a family means those relationships take a back seat. In 2014 I realized that I spend about 20-30 hours a week doing game-related preparation. I realized I needed to migrate that to Studying to be able to ensure financial security for my family. After 5 years of prioritizing studying and duties, I've found the well dry.
Anki/SRS will allow me to reduce my study hours by 1/3, from 30 to 20, but that won't happen immediately. I need to invest about 40-50 more hours to prepare my study material so its more efficient, and of course there are some Maintenance and Correction that happens as some concepts are challenging. PMBOK has about 800 concepts for me to master and memorize. HSK needs that I master 1200 words and probably around a hundred grammar points to the point that I recognize it in less than a second and can hold those words and thoughts in my temporary memory for my brain to figure out so as to understand the Chinese. Still hoping to reach that moment where it begins to make sense even If I can't understand some of the words. (like in "Me talk pretty one day" 我一天希望说得好）my goal is still to be able to introduce Chinese people into TRPGs. Why master chinese to be able to run Games in Chinese by the time I'm 45? Whats the point? The Same point why i wanted to run a game in 19C philippines, 11C Crusades, Present Day Manila, and 6C BCE Warring States.
I want to be the guy who was able to lay the ground work to be able to bring TRPGs to a culture whose values would be very Alien to TRPGs. I am aware how weird the set of goals I have regarding gaming. to Play, to run strange games, and to try very different things.
I hope my Gamble pays off, That Melee and Wizard is more accessible. That my son would more likely be interested in Melee and play it with his friends.
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